I Was Afraid

The blogosphere is full of macho talk. Visit any travel blog and you'll encounter stories of heroism, adventure, excitement and #winning. And why wouldn't you? Saying goodbye to an old way of living/thinking and embracing something new is exciting…but it's also scary. Even as a Christian who believes in the promises of God and in his sovereignty I confess that choosing to uproot and move abroad was scary.

In my old life I had the notion of security and was working towards a comfortable, predictable future in retirement. When it finally dawned on me that I needed to leave waves of fear pulsed through me:

I was afraid that I was throwing my life away.

I was afraid that I was choosing perennial poverty.

I was afraid of having a baby in a foreign country.

I was afraid of having to learn a new language.

I was afraid of being lonely.

I was afraid of getting lost all the time.

But I was also afraid of realizing in my final moments of life that I had never really lived because I was too afraid.

I'm not afraid anymore.